SPRING WATERS

As we sat around McDonalds Sunday afternoon looking over snapshots of this weekend's rendezvous with the Master, I was feeling the hesitation to go back down. The feeling was summed up in my friend's comment, "Now it's time to pay bills again." I felt the same way. Can't we just stay up here? How about another skit? Maybe one more praise and worship? How about another session on holiness?

Then I am reminded of Jesus' disciples when they felt the same way when their Master took them to the mountain. They did not want to come back down anymore. Like them, I missed the point for the whole experience at the heights. Now the work begins. We follow the footsteps of Jesus as he left all heaven's glory to fulfill the will of the Father. Just like spring waters from the summit, purified by the Lord we cascade down to the valleys below to bring the love of God to the most unlikely places - perhaps a PTA meeting, or a school, a corporation at a high rise building, the sick, the homeless or wherever the Lord sends us.

ON GLORY AND INCOVENIENCE

I still remember the panic I felt when I started to hear about these giant companies going down. I panicked because the quality of life that I have been so used to is being threatened. I have become so spoiled with all the modern conveniences that I panicked at the thought that all this might be coming to an end.

It reminded me of when I was still in the Philippines back in the 80's. I didn't have a car, a cellphone, computers - not even a colored TV. But we felt content, and we were happy. That's why even when the Volcano erupted and we had to flee cramped inside a jeepney with 16 other people, we took it in stride. Now, we panic when our Direct TV is out even for just a moment.

This also reminds me of how far away I am from the teachings of Christ. He willingly left the glory of heaven to be born in a stingy manger. He lived here on earth as a carpenter, and He willingly laid down his life to die a most humiliating death. If I really call myself a disciple of Christ, I need to hold on to these earthly things more loosely, and be willing to be inconvenienced if it is for His glory.

WE BUILT THIS CITY ON ROCK AND ROLL

The inevitable just happened. My students and I were writing goals for this year. I decided to play some 80's music in the background. I excitedly told the kids that these were the songs I listened to when I was their age (about 10 or 11). Then I had to tell them the year, "It was in the 80's." And there was a collective, "Ew!" in the room. Am I that old now?

CLASSROOM THAT BREATHES

There's something different about me this school year. Last Friday, in a situation that would have made me lose my cool with the 6th graders, I remained calm and confident, and a bit animated - like I was still having fun even in the midst of the chaos. It paid off. The class got back in order, and the working rapport was not broken.

I'm finding out that imaginative disciplining works. I think it is when I let go of my imagination that I begin to stiffen up and become rigid - in other words "inorganic". Hmmmmm, organic disciplining.

CHANCE FOR TRUE PEACE

Now that I am thirty four, it's getting harder and harder to fake peace. In my twenties I could be going through so much turmoil inside but still look calm and collect on the outside - now, here I am in an endoscopy clinic's waiting room.
It's really hard to parade a fake smile when acid is going up your esophagus.

When in fact, there's no faking with with God. He can see right into what's really going on. Is this part of becoming more and more like Christ?

HOW TO SURVIVE A WILD FIRE

I got my "obra-maestra" (my term paper) back yesterday, for the second time. I felt like my eyes were going to pop out of their sockets (blood pressure rising). It really broke me down. What a way to feel on your birthday. Somehow, I knew God was at work, although it hurts.

Here I am, hours away from praise team rehearsal, and I am as dry as a Texas drought. To make things worse I have bit of a wild-fire that's still burning from yesterday's bad news. Alone in the house, I was trying to prepare for tomorrows worship. I just couldn't.

Grabbed my Bible, and I went to the lake. As I read and intermittently looking out at the gorgeous sight before me, sail boats passing by, the peaceful water, the great cloud formations up above, I began to relax.

Sometimes, I have to come to the end of my rope so that I can learn that God really cares for every aspect of my life. I was suffocating in the midst of my wild fire worries hell bent on staying there until I have fixed these problems on my own. That right there is your recipe to self-destruction.

My dad told me that when there is wild fire, you run in the direction of the wind, away from the source of the fire. Then, surprisingly, you start burning the grassy area you found and stay there. That way, the wilf fire won't spread any more, and you have saved yourself from suffocation.

I had to do that today, but I ran to the Lord. In doing so, I found out that all I have to do is do what I am supposed to do, and not worry about the other things. So what is it that I am supposed to do, my designation in the scheme of things?

Worship. My job is to run and stay my course. Run away from baggages that will weigh me down and suffocate me. And then, burn - burn my incense in the altar of God. In brokenness cry out to Him and bring Him all my cares.

DUCK CURRY

It's been 2 hours and 19 minutes into my 34th year, and I don't feel any different - just a little heartburn from Thailand. And just about now, the best gift happens - it's raining. (I'm stepping out for a minute here.)

Ten years ago I would have been in the rain, actually, I thought about it, until I got distracted by the water falling from the gutter onto the Cooper. Then just like that, the magic was gone. I started worrying about the car's paint job, and then mosquitoes starting feasting on me. I went in.

That's just my point. O how I miss the spontaneity of my 20's. Now that I am 34, it has to be Combination Pad-Thai, Tom Yam Noodles and Pad Puket.

However, I thank God for my Pastors Butch and Robert (both are my seniors of course). Had a talk with Pastor Butch tonight at Starbucks. Talking with this guy - you gotta hang on tight. It's like running with bulls in Spain. You walk away giddy, shaken and feeling like Rocky all at the same time - in a soul level I should say.

And then there's Pastor Robert. Most of the time, men his age are a bit easy to define. Then there's this guy who can perhaps do a 5 hour lecture on 5 Point Calvinism without notes just as passionately as he could expound on all that you need to know about Rock and Roll. At the moment, I'm listening to a CD he lent me by a Japanese-jazz-funk-hiphop-fusion-band called Sonic Bloom.

Next time, I'm ordering the Kaeng Phet Ped Yang, please.

GOLD MEDAL THURSDAY

Yesterday, I wore my new running shoes all day. I didn't get to run or go to the gym, but I wore them. That's a baby step towards the goal I thought. Good job, self.

Then today -even better. I drove past the gym - twice. Didn't make it inside, but I thought about it. I'm indeed breaking new grounds here - intellectually. FREE YOUR MIND AND THE REST WILL FOLLOW!

SMILE

I met up with friends whom I haven't seen in a long time. As I was on my way to the meeting I did some serious brainstorming about how I am going to react once I hear the dreaded, "Oh my, what happened to you?"

It's either my plan worked, or they are just the most sensitive kindest people on the planet. They didn't say anything of that sort. My plan: smile - smile like there is no tomorrow. Yes, my plan worked.

As we were exchanging parting words one of them tells me, "So what are you now, almost close to 40?" Darn - I didn't see that coming. Smile.

THE SOUND OF TRAIN

When I hear the train from the distance it reminds me that it has been 17 years that we have been here in the USA. It seems like it was just yesterday. Our first Texas summer, Volleyball at Whiterock with Ferdie and the gang, the sleepy drive to Criswell with Uncle Luis and Tim, riding at the back of Ate Mitz's yellow Nissan with Sandi Patty, Amy Grant or Whitney Houston blaring in the second hand stereo after classes , Ate Fae's field trips, baby sitting for the DTS couple.

I praise God that when I hear the sound of the train from the distance, all I am flooded with are wonderful memories. When I look at the big picture even the blotches of difficulties find their beautiful place in God's masterful work. Thank You, Lord. I can't wait to see all that You will do from here on.

NOT A BAD ENDING

Last night I was at the movies and I didn't eat junk foods, but instead I ate a healthy snack. Things are looking up - I had a sense that I could live with this kind of healthy eating habit.

FROM BAD TO WORSE

Yesterday was a disaster. I was going to start working out and eating healthier. I said today was going to be it. Today was not any better - worse. Well, the day is not done yet.